in answer to your many questions about how yesterday went.
swimmingly.
well…
it depends on who you ask.
I walked Zoe to her classroom.
the teacher pointed out her coat hook and helped put away the school supplies.
then the teacher turned to Zoe and said, “Okay, now say goodbye to mama.”
heh???
but.
but.
but…I’m not ready to leave yet!
my baby girl isn’t ready for me to leave yet!
Zoe then, proceeded to run up to me, gave me a quick kiss and a less than sincere hug.
and said, “Bye, mommy! I love you.”
and ran into her classroom.
I couldn’t do it.
I couldn’t say the thing that I say to my children every waking moment of the day.
I couldn’t say it because my eyes had already welled up and the inevitable snot stream was beginning to make it’s way down my nasal passages.
(this is the loveliness that occurs when you aren’t the type to wear your emotion on your sleeve.)
instead, I usually end up wiping my “emotion” all over my sleeve.
I wanted so badly to reciprocate her “I love you.”
but my lips and my teeth were the only things keeping me from letting the waterworks loose all over my sweet little girl.
so I just smiled.
then, quickly turned my back and walked that agonizing hallway back out to the parking lot.
I couldn’t, at this point, keep my tears withheld.
I sobbed so uncontrollably that passersby were probably staring in my direction, wondering why this crazy woman was having such disturbing convulsions and yet still managing to walk about, unperturbed.
the whole 3 and a half minute drive back home was the same story.
only, now throw in a leaky nose, running mascara, foggy contacts along with the uncontrollable convulsing and you have the great makings for a horrific traffic accident.
I managed to make it home alive and actually happened to survive Zoe’s first day.
by noon, when her brothers and I came to pick her up, I had gotten over my selfish tantrum and when I saw that excitement all throughout her entire body, I knew everything was going to be okay.
(cue leaky nose.)
6 responses to “first day of school and a leaky nose…”
Yeah for Zoe and Mama! You did it!
She looked adorable for her first day.
PS – Margot says “Zoe” now, so I think this means it is time for a visit 🙂
“There there mommy!” *wink*
I won’t say HA, no matter how much I’m tempted. It’s hard watching your first born and lets face it, friend and baby walk away with a stranger, whether she is eager or shedding tears.
To be reassuring (as today was Sydney’s forth day) I can say that it gets a little easier every time.
I’m not saying that I don’t watch the clock still, but I no longer look like a maniac walking home. 🙂
aww, you did it! I cried too, it is a huge change in the whole families life.
I’m learning that it is ok to have fun and enjoy myself without the Nut. When Aaron, Tiny Toes and I go out and have fun together I always feel sorta guilty that we are having fun without the Nut…
Yeah Zoe! Yeah mom! It makes it so much easier when your child actually likes to go to school doesn’t it? Miles is still loving it. I think I would have died or worse kept him at home locked in the house if had so much as pouted about it.
Way to go you guys: )
hugs
I just wanted to let you know that I read your blog everyday to my grandmother. I am with her 6 hours a day as her companion as she is blind and she LOVES to hear about your kids and says you have a real gift of writing. Keep up the good work!
Also wanted to say thank you for the congrats on the UB photo contest win. I was so excited to actually win, it’s great to have that local group of people that loves photography as much as I do. 🙂
-ame / grandma
It is a huge milestone isn’t it. It doesn’t change either. After Mike graduated from high school and moved out. I did ok. When we got his stuff for college. I did ok. His first day of school.
I sat and thought about my baby boy being in his first class of his freshman year in college I had to pull the car over and cried my eyes out for a few minutes.