a shattered tail light and a total-ed ego…


you wouldn’t believe the freaky thing that happened to me today.
I decided to take a shortcut (shortcuts are almost never shortcuts, this should have been a clue.) on the way to an ironing job I do out in the suburbs.

I turned down a short little street that ties into a busy main fare. this street barely

accommodates two lanes of traffic it is so narrow. as soon as I turned onto it, I
noticed the entire street was packed with construction vehicles. and straight ahead, a steam roller was quickly charging it’s way toward me.

So I suddenly concluded that I must turn around and go down the next street instead, since I really didn’t care to sit in my car for the next 2 weeks watching a parking lot be built.
This is when the weirdness ensued. I pulled into a nearby driveway, put the car into reverse and quickly backed up into the street.


BANG!!!!!!!

I suddenly felt as if I had been rear-ended by a Mac Truck.
or, if possible, by a moving brick wall.
what the holy heck was that??????
(I think those were my exact words. maybe, subtract one of them and add one more.)

I looked into the review mirror and saw nothing!
I was no where near any of the construction vehicles. in fact, the closest rig was a Semi-truck parked about 10 feet away.

I tried to back up more. (Wow! seriously?…you’re thinking.)
the car wouldn’t budge, so I tried to pull back into the drive-way.
nothing.

Oh crap! I think was my next verbiage.
I turned off the car, opened the door and got out.
walked behind the car and there it was…..
a huganticnormous trailer bed surgically attached, it would seem , to my Dodge Intrepid’s backside.

where in the hell did that come from!!! pardon my language, but that was exactly what flew out of my absolutely flabbergasted mouth, at this point.

suddenly, I notice a friendly contractor walking towards me, wearing what had to be the biggest, dumbest grin on his face.

I instantly go into nervous “guilty” mode and shout, “I know. it was my fault! I just didn’t see your truck bed there. I didn’t even see it.”

instead of maybe going the “flaming witch” route and jumping from my car screaming, “Why the hell don’t you have cones around that thing or maybe a white flag or possibly a giant neon sign?????!!!!!!

whatever my demeanor, he was extremely nice about it, indicating to me, that he probably knew he was at fault for having that monster truck parked on a city street, blocking someone’s driveway. (that, coupled with the fact that my teeny, pathetic car did absolutely NO damage to his trailer. except for just sprinkling some taillight dust over it.)

at any rate, I just wanted to get out of there.
I’m uncertain whether the chest pain I soon was experiencing was a result of an asthma attack, a panic attack or a heart attack.
all three were very plausible at this point in time.

I drove straight to the Body Shop where my dad is Foreman. (can we say Happenstance!)
he eased my mind when he told me it just looked like the taillight needed replaced.
but you could have cut the father-daughter condescension in the air with a knife.

really, I don’t think my dad even had a lecture in mind for this incident. I simply didn’t see that truck bed there. and really, it shouldn’t have been there.
and $60 later, a replaced taillight and a very sore neck and shoulders, my car looks like it was barely scratched.
but I ‘m sporting an ego that is covered with roadrash and throbbing from the pain of total shock of what happened.

I still can’t believe it.
I’m just thankful that the kids weren’t in the car with me and that I hit a truck bed and not another driver.

as far as I’m concerned, it could have been a ufo and I still wouldn’t have been as surprised as I was to see that trailer there!

have any of you done anything this incredibly retarded?
be honest, now!

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13 responses to “a shattered tail light and a total-ed ego…”

  1. Okay, I do feel a little better…But, seriously, this isn’t retarded! You didn’t SEE it! How can you avoid hitting something you cannot see? Stupid trailer bed…Grrr.

  2. yes I too have done something somewhat similar. How about the time a month or two ago . . . .I had just gotten done with my massage that I get every month and drove home all relaxed and somewhat out of it. I got home and did some things around the house then I got ready to go to my grandma’s house for my day of work. As I was backing out of the drive way (the exact same driveway that I have backed out of for 3 years now!) I smashed right into our gate and took the passenger side mirror right off the door!!!!!!!!! I of course was so relaxed from my massage didn’t notice how close I was to the gate and after I got out and looked and the mirror just hanging there from electrical cords, I can honestly say I didn’t even mind. Massages are great! LOL Mine was an easy fix too, Jason put some “quick tight” on it and it went right back on and is still on to this day! So don’t feel bad, I have done this too!

  3. Ha ha, ha ha ha…..

    I actually have had an accident that was my fault – When we lived in Tigard, these ridiculous apartments had covered parking with huge poles on either side of the spaces. When backing out of the space, I was not paying attention and SMACKED right into the pole. Ben was like “LOOK OUT!” and do you want to know my response?? I SCREAMED, and KEPT GOING!

    Um, yeah.. I think you are usually supposed to STOP when you hear someone yell look out. It ripped part of the headlight area off and dented the crap out of the bumper.

  4. See, Bethany….I told you it would make you feel better.
    and yeah, STUPID TRAILER!
    you don’t know how badly I wanted to kick it before I drove off! ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. You know my driving history..first hand.
    Don’t feel bad my mom recently pulled out onto a busy road right into a flat bed truck that she didn’t see. It happens to all of us. I’m just glad that you weren’t hurt!

  6. Maija,
    I think I’m still in shock! I really don’t understand how I could have missed that huge thing.
    And, yes, I wasn’t hurt. I am still a little sore in the neck and shoulder department but that’s due to the tensing up I did when it first happened. It scared me and surprised me at the same time!

  7. I love that this story had a happy ending…other than the shaken nerves and sore neck. You know the kind of ending that includes insurance premiums. Hope you feel better. Yay dad.

  8. Many, many years ago I was helping my dad turn in his leased Jeep Grand Cherokee and had followed him to the bank in his brand new Mercedes Sedan that cost around $80,000. I’ve always thought I was a good driver and didn’t feel any qualms about handling the tank that he’d purchased. Well, he parked the Jeep and went into the bank while I circled this tiny parking lot searching for a good spot to park the “Beast”. I decided to back up when suddenly I heard this loud, nauseating, sound of metal scraping the hell out of metal. In my zeal to find a good spot, I had not seen a post towards the back right side of the car that had a nail or screw sticking out of it and it was presently tearing up the side of my dad’s expensive new car. Let me tell you, we had a 30 minute ride back to our town and it was the longest of my whole life. He still talks about it actually and it happened in 1997.

    I’m very glad your dad was nice to you about it even if he wanted to say something, he held it back. Good for him!

    Don’t feel bad about it. That’s why they call them accidents and not purposedents. ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Oh yeah! Another time, I was backing out of the garage and I hit the house. THAT was a doozy! My dad still loves to tell that one too.

    Hmmmm. Maybe I’m not as good at driving as I keep telling my husband I am…..

  10. thank you, Mrs. G! you know, when I first called my husband to tell him, he just sat on the line and said nothing. I actually had to shout, “I’m okay, by the way!” he claims he was in shock.

    Evie,
    well, let’s see….your second comment reminds me of #5 on my weird list!! driving up on my folks front porch! thank goodness my dad is a body man but don’t think for one second he’ll ever let me forget about that incident.

  11. No, that was an accident, and does not qualify as retarded.
    I have plenty of truly retarded things I have done, but enough about me ๐Ÿ˜‰

  12. You think that was dumb? Remember when I drove your little brother to school with no bra, in sweats, no makeup, hair unbrushed on a wet, drizzly morning and backed into a very good-looking young man? It did teach me to never leave the house looking like that again! And don’t forget, at least you’ve never run over a person like some people…